I'm Lost Without You
by Emerald Sky
Summary: A song fic using the song 'I'm Lost Without You' by Blink 182. Hermione's leaving to Paris. Why is that Draco Malfoy is the one to hurt most? Review!


****

I'm Lost Without You .. -  
.. -Blink 182

..Emerald Sky -

****

Summary .. - Hermione's leaving to Paris. Why is that Draco Malfoy is the one to hurt most?

****

Disclaimer .. - Song lyrics belong to Blink 182. Harry Potter series belongs to JK Rowling.

****

AN .. - If you never heard the song before it's fine. But it sets a very important mood to the fic actually XD

..

He remembered flashing the brunette a brilliant smile from across the Great Hall. She had gave a puzzled expression for no more than a second and smiled back before turning back to Potter and Weasley. Crabbe had probably noticed and was utterly and completely confused but he hadn't cared. He thought maybe he was beginning to fall in love with her. And he hadn't cared because he knew it was right, it had just felt right.

She had been the only one he had ever cried in front of in his life. She had been the only one to ever confiscate his pair of scissors from under his bed when he wasn't there.

**__**

I swear that I can go on forever again  
Please let me know that my one bad day will end

He remembered when the feelings had gone from faint to over whelmingly obsessive. He began to want to spend every minute of spare time with her. Having shared Head boy and Head Girl tower with her, this seemed more less unreasonable. He saw passed her for what she appeared to be and began to see who she really was. For the first time in his life he was able to express feelings and no longer be forced to act like they were never there. And she responded in every caring matter possible.

Someone cared about him. Someone had actually cared about him.

He remembered their first kiss.

__

He moaned in pain as she dabbed his wound with the potion soaked cloth. He watched her through one eye as the other watered and clenched shut in stinging agony from the healing potion. Her hazel eyes flicked from the deep cut below his stinging eye to his piercing silver gaze. He noticed her concerned expression as she reassured him it would be okay in a gently tone.

His annoyed expression softened until she applied more potion to the burning cut. "Ouch." he complained, attempting to pull her hand away from the mark his father had left him the night before.

She threw the cloth down before telling him he wasn't helping.

"Why do you care anyway?" he had to ask.

Her chocolate eyes searched his as she paused for a long while, at a lose of words. Finally she replied, "I can't explain why I care about you, I just do."

He felt his chest ache and a knot form in his throat because he knew that was how he felt about her. Then it happened. He felt her lips press against his in a soft passionate kiss. Draco wasn't sure if it were him that had kissed her or the other way around but he enjoyed every second of it.

****

I will go down as your lover, your friend  
Give me your lips and with one kiss we begin

He wished every second of the feel of her velvet wet lips against his had been longer every time they had kissed now. That he had kissed her more often. That he had told her he loved her more often. He should have told every day and every night. When they left for classes in the morning and when they went to sleep. But even then it would never be enough to express how he felt now that he knew she was leaving.

Would he ever see her again? Would she remember him? Would she still love him when she was gone or find someone else? When she leaves will she leave behind all the memories and moments they had shared together?

_****_

Are you afraid of being alone  
Cause I am, I'm lost without you

__

"Stay with me." he pleaded. "Run away with me after school and we'll live together forever."

"I...I can't." she choked. "We have to very different lives, Draco. I think it's best if we live to different paths."

"What are you saying?" he questioned, feeling as if his heart was about to shatter.

"I'm saying that I've been excepted to train at the finest college in all of the wizarding world!" She flashed him a weak smile behind her teary face. "Aren't you proud of me? I'm going to Paris!"

Draco's gaze fell to the floor. He didn't want her to leave, was he being selfish? If she left, yes, she would have a truly better life then to live it with him. He saw the dark mark on his arm flash before his eyes and he withdrew it quickly. "...I'm sorry" he apologized.

****

Are you afraid of leaving tonight  
Cause I am, I'm lost without you

Now he sat on the edge of his bed with his tear streaked face in his hands, hopelessly waiting for everything to be okay. For her to step through his open bedroom door and tell him that she gave up everything for him.

An hour passed, she wasn't coming. How could he have been so foolish not have said good bye? Why had he been selfish enough to refuse to tell her he loved her one last time? It was to late. She left him, it was all over.

His hand trailed under his pillow and drew out a crumbled tarred picture and stared down at it with pained eyes.

_****_

I'll leave my room open till sunrise for you  
I'll keep my eyes patiently focused on you

The Gryffindor in the picture smiled and told him not to cry before he threw it to the floor and kicked it under the bed. He couldn't live knowing that the beautiful teen in the photograph was really gone forever.

He would write letters to her almost everyday, he wouldn't let her forget him. Not after everything she did for him.

He heard floor boards creak in the ancient corridor leading to his bedroom. The door creaked and Draco's head snapped in it's direction. Was someone there? No, no one was there. It had been the wind from his open window. Why was ever little sound such a hope for her presence to him? Why was he becoming so desperate for her return when he knew she would never come back to him. He should have never aloud himself to fall in love with the Mudblood.

_****_

Where are you now I can hear footsteps I'm dreaming  
And if you will, keep me from waking to believe this

Another hour passed before the dim light from the candles on his bedside table burnt out and he finally drifted off into an uneasy sleep. Probably to dream about the girl he would miss forever.

_****_

Are you afraid of being alone  
Cause I am, I'm lost without you

Somewhere outside Draco's window a brunette stepped out of her carriage, clutching her luggage in shakey hands. "My place had always been right here with you." she would tell him when he awoke.


End file.
